In my estimation yes, some do. It begins with young boys being babied by their mother’s way beyond the time that they should be doing for themselves. Many times it gets back to the stereo-typical nonsense of what is women’s work and what is men’s work. It stands to reason if the only thing that is considered men’s work in a home requires heavy moving or lifting that young boys are incapable of doing at an early age then boys will be much older than girls are before they start pitching in with household responsibilities. If they are not expected to clean their rooms, bake cookies or cake, dust or vacuum a house, do dishes, mow the lawn,babysit or do their laundry then they will be much too old before they are called on to handle any responsibility at all. Do not mistake activities like boy scouts, t-ball,play acting or soccer for responsibility or work. They are what they say they are in that they are activities.
Drive and motivation are taught they are not something that we are naturally born with. Boys are also much older than girls when they learn how to balance responsiblity with play time/activities. If the family owns a business or they grow up on a farm or ranch where responsibility begins at an early age then boys sometimes will be as motivated and driven at the same rate that girls are. When we ask nothing of our boys we spoil them sometimes for a lifetime.
There are a lot of people on the political right that feel that the equal rights amendment should be repealed as it is unfair to young white males but what they are failing to see is the lack of motivation and maturity that is missing in some of them today. This is not something new as for generations the males of the families have always been spoiled when it comes to household duties. Although it has been more of a societal thing than to blame it on women entirely, there certainly is no reason for it to continue today.Both minorities and women in my estimation would be hired over these men even without an equal opportunity act, simply because both are more motivated and grateful to accept entry-level and to work their way up with less pay, even with their college degrees. For years white males were the only ones with the college degrees, so these jobs went to them automatically and now they have to compete. Although they say it is unfair the real question really is where is their ambition and drive? They no longer can demand the high starting salaries and begin in middle management. As a result we do tend to see a higher unemployment rate in this area. Women going home to raise the children so these white males can have the jobs women are currently holding , as the right-wing would wish and is working towards changing the constitution on, will not solve the problem if they are too immature or lazy to put in the hours it takes and accept entry-level with less pay.
Men are born of a woman, raised by a woman, and marry a woman in our stereo-typical society so to deny the fact that women make men lazy would be to deny that the sun rises or there are no lazy men. Men get sick of women nagging them but in truth if they were taught that they are as responsible as girls are to maintain their own living space, do their laundry and help out in the kitchen women would not have to nag them. They would,just like women do, see a need and get up off the lazy boy and take care of it. This is not to suggest that there are not plenty of lazy women as well. Many girls are never taught to be self-sufficient at home either and they do grow up with the exact same lack of motivation and drive. It is always a mistake not to teach children responsibility to take care of their own needs from rising on their own at a reasonable hour of the morning to balancing a check book before they leave home at 18. The great majority of us should know and understand that but if the problem is that there is no drive or motivation in the mother or she has discovered it is easier to do it herself than to take the time to teach the child then wives and sometimes husbands will have to pay the consequence for it at a later date.
Too many times, as I wrote in my post yesterday, women will try to separate fathers from their children and then complain that the man in her life does not help out more with the children. If every attempt a man makes to father his children is met with the disapproval of his wife then many times he will just give up and let her do the job. This also applies to helping out in the kitchen, doing house work or laundry or balancing the check book. If each time he attempts to do something he is met with “You never do it right” then women can be certain that they will not do it, period. These are not the men I refer to as most of them do not start out lazy although this definitely is another way that women do make men lazy.
The men that I am talking about being lazy are the men that will deliberately claim to not be able to do something when in truth it is a job he could quite easily do and do well but simply does not like doing so claims incompetency. Also the men that were told as little boys it was women’s work but now that they are grown men they have no real excuse to not know that it is their job as well beyond the fact they are simply too lazy and do not even offer help and in both these cases it is no longer the blame of a woman but their own.
Since some girls learn to do housework which isn’t always pleasant and the fact that you take college courses that you do not like taking, they learn early that on a job things will be expected of them that they do not enjoy doing, and already have found that to be true throughout their life and are prepared to do so. They learn early training for the job that they will diligently work later in life.Also the men that truly do not have a clue and refuse to learn anyway as they grew up with the attitude that they were somehow privileged or exempt from doing it and feel it was not their place to do or learn. As a result when or if they do get and take the entry-level job later with less pay their attitude when required to do what they feel is beneath them comes out in a hurry, Employers do not have time to babysit and today a person has to be prepared to learn on their own and accept what ever the situation might hand them.They mooched off Mom and Dad past their teens and beyond because every job was somehow or some way beneath their great talent or education.
A motivated or driven man and woman do not wait to be told or taught how to do anything and this is what today’s companies are not only looking for but demanding of their employees. Most of them are self-taught through trial and error. They watched their parents fix broken objects rather than throw them out and they take the same principle to heart when they have their own homes or work on the job. What they can not learn on their own they will read and educate themselves on. Even on weekends they are up as early as they are during weekdays, Most get up with an enthusiasm to start the day and get something done or accomplished. These men are nemesis of the lazy man and most of them as well are white males that were willing to begin at entry-level as well. I am not trying to say that all white males are lazy because they are not. In this post though I do concentrate on the lazy white male since it is the title of my post.
If a son grew up only hearing bitching because their mother has to always do everything and a father is off doing a job that he knows nothing about beyond the father comes home and is waited on then he will also grow up with the principle that girls and women work and men lounge in lazy boys. The same is true on the other hand with girls and their mothers. If the mother spends a great deal of her time watching mom talk on the phone, shopping and napping and then Dad comes home to cook dinner and listen to how hard the mother claims she has been working all day, the girl will grow up thinking men work and women are waited on. Either way neither parent or child wins. It is what children see at home that they live out in adulthood.
There is a great deal of hope for both these men and women that were not taught self-sufficiency at an earlier age if they are attending school or making advances on a job or working towards owning their own shops at the time we meet them. If we marry and love them, are patient with them, establish goals to reach together by both working towards the same goal and we do not have parent interference where Dad is fixing and Mom is cleaning then laziness does not have to be nor is it a permanent condition. Many times with encouragement these same people can and will end up being CEO’s of major Companies and even Doctors. The age we get them and the motivation of the parent when they grow up and acknowledges the hours that went into the parent’s jobs that they did not see when they were young, sometimes is all they need. After all, behind every successful man is a woman. To change the constitution for the often inept and the always entitled white male(in their minds only) ,amongst us, in order to replace highly qualified minorities and women is just another insane attempt trying to find weight in the political agenda of the right-wing movement today,
When these adult children have no work history, are not a full-time student, or self motivated in any way when we are meeting them for the first time, the likelihood they ever will have ambition or motivation is fairly close to nil. Especially be aware of the adult that is living at home with mom and dad, getting their laundry done, and meals cooked and every job is just not right for them but they are looking. At the same token to what degree of a mooch they are past their teen years is good to look at as if they’re not working they are then mooching. We as a Nation seem to be using blinders to the degree in which the white middle class is being hit with the problem of drug use. It appears to begin with the abuse of prescription drugs taken from family medicine cabinets and then goes to the streets as well as the increase due to manufactured meth in our own borders. Some families get tired of them so they move on to mooch off of friends and other family members and more than likely will also clam onto you for a lifetime of financial support if you allow it to happen.
As the great majority of us know and understand, throughout history, not all men have supported their families. Many mothers, even in homes where divorce does not happen, have over the centuries been the bread-winner of the family. I know beginning with my husband’s and my generation and going back two more to the late 1800′s in both our families 1 out of every 3 families, even when white males were the only ones that were educated and before the invent of today’s birth control, women were the bread winners of the family. That was and has been true whether the couples have remained married or divorced. I would not be surprised if the National average would show the same results or greater. It would be wise for mothers of sons that are being babied into their adult years and the right-wing to understand that as well.